Emotional Bandwidth: Why You Sometimes Can’t Be There for People You Love | Dr. Tracey Marks
Emotional bandwidth explained: why cognitive load and stress make empathy harder, and why low bandwidth looks like emotional unavailability in relationships. Take my FREE 3-min Brain Quiz to master focus & [...]

A Juneteenth Reflection for SurvivorAffirmations: Not a Bill. A Bridge.
Some of us grew up hearing about sacrifice in ways that hurt.
“I did everything for you.”
“After all I gave up.”
“You owe me.”
Those words can land heavy in the body when love has been tied to guilt. Survivor [...]

10 Facts About Lift Every Voice and SING!
So my childhood was spent learning this song. We sang this and other songs like it for assemblies. I get out into the world and learn not only have others not heard the song but they see it as "hateful"?
Me: But you don't kn [...]

There Are Souls Beyond the Scoreboard: A History Lesson in Hope, Radio, and Second Wind (podcast episode)
We are not living in the time of afterschool specials, radio dedications, and songs that reached through the static to touch a hurting child’s heart.
So sometimes we have to borrow from the past.
We have to go back to song [...]

Before You Yell “Cocaine,” Learn What 1980s Black Joy Looked Like
The 1980s Were Competitive Joy
A room full of Black people dancing hard.
A Black singer sweating through a performance.
A Soul Train line with everybody dressed like joy had somewhere important to be.
A big Black [...]

Dr. Tracey Marks: People Who Drain You vs. People Who Energize You
Why do some people calm your brain while others drain it? One of our favorite psychiatrists, Dr. Tracey Marks, explains how your nervous system regulates with safe people—plus a simple body check.
[...]
What “Find 100 Ways” Teaches Us About Uplifting the People We Love
There are some songs that do not simply play.
They enter the room.
They adjust the light.
They sit beside you with a kind of grown tenderness and remind you that love was never supposed to feel careless.
James Ingram [...]
The Playlist: Funk, Soul, and Body Release
Some anxiety does not need another explanation. It needs a doorway out of the body.
Sometimes anxiety does not leave through thinking. Sometimes it leaves through the shoulders. Through the jaw. Through the hands. Through the b [...]

The Empty Nest is a Healing Space
The empty nest is not the end of motherhood.
It may be the beginning of a woman’s re-encounter with herself.
Not just a quiet house.
Not just “the children are gone now.”
Not just a season people joke about with sadness, lon [...]
When Dismissal Tries to Turn You Against Your Own Body
“The function, the very serious function of racism is distraction. It keeps you from doing your work. It keeps you explaining, over and over again, your reason for being.” Toni Morrison
Mistreatment often tries to make th [...]

Elizabeth Packard: The Woman They Called Insane Until She Changed the Law
Elizabeth Packard was not simply a “wronged wife.”
She was a mother. A thinker. A religious dissenter. A wife under the rule of a husband who believed disagreement was disobedience. She was a woman living under laws that trea [...]
Affirmations for Patients Who Are Afraid They Will Not Be Heard at the Doctor’s Office
There is a particular kind of tired that comes from knowing something is happening in your body, then having to gather your strength to explain it to someone who may or may not listen.
Some patients walk into the doctor’s offic [...]

Different Go-Go, Same Refusal to Disappear into Misery
I just discovered something beautiful.
There are two kinds of “GoGo.”
One was born in Washington, DC.
One comes from Tanzania.
And somehow, both are rooted in survival.
Many of us Black Americans kno [...]
Mama I Love You: Women Are Amazing, Unique, and Special!
Tyron Woodley’s mother congratulates Kamaru Usman at UFC 235
"It's all good, baby. It's all good. It's your turn. It ain't his turn."
Please, do not ever let anyone convince you of false th [...]

Ketty Lester: Honor the Firsts, Remember the Closed Doors
Ketty Lester deserves more than a passing mention. She deserves the kind of appreciation that slows the room down.
Born Revoyda Frierson in Hope, Arkansas, she came from a farming family and grew into a singer and actress whose [...]

The 12 Somatic Knots of Trauma — The Complete Map from Sacrum to Jaw (and How to Untie Them)
updated from March 24, 2024
Somatic healing is not just “take a deep breath and calm down.”
Sometimes your body is holding a story your mouth got tired of telling.
Your shoulders may remember what you had to carry.
[...]

Their Words Do Not Name Me. Survival Does.
✨ Affirmation ✨
Their words tried to cling to me like chains,
but I shook them off.
Their judgments do not define me.
Their names do not name me.
I carry the name given by my survival—Strength. Courage. Unbreakable.
I wa [...]

The Lie of “Not Enough Trained People”: What Martin, Motown, and Black Representation Already Proved
There is an old lie that keeps getting dressed up as wisdom.
It says Black communities do not get full representation because there are not enough “trained” people.
Not enough trained actors.
Not enough trained writers.
Not [...]
The Black Performance Genius Behind America’s “Iconic” Jazz Style
I like Bob Fosse too. He was a brilliant dancer and choreographer. But his style is heavily influenced by Black dancers. You can't even put too much "heavy" on the "heavily influenced."
American stage entertainment keeps [...]
AFFIRMATIONS AND SELF LOVE
Let Them Cheer for the Wrong Side. I’m Still Here. I’m Still Whole.
SurvivorAffirmations.com | Inspired by WeSurviveAbuse.com
They clapped for the one who caused the harm.They stood beside him, t [...]
HEALING JOURNEY
🖤 Survivor Affirmations for the Ones Who Never Got the Apology
And were told to stay silent for someone else’s comfort.
I was not too much. I was too aware. And they were not ready for the truth I [...]
🐑 Why “Black Sheep” Roles Are Common in Dysfunctional Families
1. Scapegoating Relieves Pressure on the Group
In families that are unstable or abusive, members often project problems onto one person.
[...]
An Affirmation for Growing Beyond the Outer Markers
I am growing beyond symbols.
Beyond badges, titles, memberships, and borrowed names.
What once helped me find my footing no longer defines my [...]
How Depression Looks Different in Black Women
Years ago, it shocked me when I learned I was depressed. I was not weepy or crying. The healer had to be wrong. But she was not. She was brilliant. Sh [...]
The Empty Nest is a Healing Space
The empty nest is not the end of motherhood.
It may be the beginning of a woman’s re-encounter with herself.
Not just a quiet house.
Not just “the [...]
CONFIDENCE/POWER/RESILIENCE

Soul Train Dancer Tamechi Toney Briggs Influenced A Generation & Created Infamous MC Hammer Pants
I've been screaming! No one was going to tell me?
Now all those years watching Soul Train and I did not make this connection when MC Hammer, who I a [...]
Dear Survivor: You’re Not Falling Behind—You’re Becoming.
Dear Survivor,
The world may call it failure—But more often, it is evolution in motion.It is transformation wearing unfamiliar clothes.It is the ho [...]
💫 10 Signs You Are Reclaiming Yourself
Even if you don’t feel “healed” yet, you are rising. Quietly, deeply, powerfully.
Survivor, there are days when healing feels invisible.You may not b [...]

Dr. Tracey Marks: People Who Drain You vs. People Who Energize You
Why do some people calm your brain while others drain it? One of our favorite psychiatrists, Dr. Tracey Marks, explains how your nervous system regula [...]
HEALTHING JOURNEY
8 Power Moves to Use When You’re Disrespected from Elle Lacey
I do like that we've moved towards accepting that there will be moments that people may not treat us with the amount of respect that we would hope. Wi [...]
How Focusing on Body Movement Benefits People Overcoming Trauma
Have you ever thought about where trauma and stress are locked in your body? How it impacts your body?For so long Western society has focused on body [...]
Tackle Life Tips: Decluttering Strategies (short ebook)
For some people who are healing from physical and/or emotional trauma, de-cluttering is a constant challenge.
Here are 4 Quick Tips That May Hel [...]
Oh, We Been the Fire
Look at us.
Not surviving — shining.
That kind of laughter that breaks every chain still trying to hold on.
That joy they said was too loud f [...]
She Is AMAZING
12 Reasons Lauryn Hill Deserves More Respect for Her Impact on Music (w/affirmations)
The only reason that men question Lauryn Hill's
accomplishments
is because they can't find a way
to take credit for them.
Lauryn Hill was never j [...]
They Tried to Erase Her: The Black Woman Behind the Internet
Just because some people don’t clap for you doesn’t mean your victories aren’t worth celebrating. “Innovation is my birthright—I claim it boldly.” [...]
Great Re-Inventors: Eartha Kitt #courage #changeyourlife #comeback
After being blacklisted in the United States in 1968, Eartha Kitt had several choices. She chose to find new doors and soar.
[...]
Ketty Lester: Honor the Firsts, Remember the Closed Doors
Ketty Lester deserves more than a passing mention. She deserves the kind of appreciation that slows the room down.
Born Revoyda Frierson in Hope, Ark [...]
Keep on Movin: Quotes on Perseverance from Black Women
♥ Someone was hurt before you, wronged before you, hungry before you, frightened before you, beaten before you, humiliated before you, raped b [...]
Different Go-Go, Same Refusal to Disappear into Misery
I just discovered something beautiful.
There are two kinds of “GoGo.”
One was born in Washington, DC.
One comes from Tanzania.
And somehow [...]
ART HEALS
There Are Souls Beyond the Scoreboard: A History Lesson in Hope, Radio, and Second Wind (podcast episode)
We are not living in the time of afterschool specials, radio dedications, and songs that reached through the static to touch a hurting child’s heart.
[...]
JOURNALING/WRITING IN A HEALTHIER WORLD
WE Survive Abuse Podcast












